35- bored in hospital
July 15, 2012
Today is the 9th day of my hospital stay. They saw in the MRI that the inflammation in my back is still very big. I don’t know what they want to do about that because I haven’t talked to a specialist yet. It’s a little annoying that after 9 days nobody has talked to me yet.
I heard that they still don’t want to operate it. They want to wait 6 more weeks. But I don’t think anything will change in those 6 weeks and I don’t have time to wait anymore. I need to get on the transplant list and this won’t happen as long as my back is infected.
I am still throwing up several times a day. I get strong infusions against that. Usually they are used for cancer patients when they throw up while having their chemotherapy.
I still get 5 different antibiotics at the same time but none of them seems to work.
I’m watching movies and I read a lot, but I also just listen to music while daydreaming.
I imagine all the things I will do if I get my new lungs. I want to travel, to see the world. I want to run and dance and jump around.
Here it’s cold and rainy although it’s July. I wish I could fly to a sunny island. I miss beaches, the sea and the sun.
The nurses here are very nice, we talk a lot and have fun. But I miss home, I miss my family and my friends.
The doctors are afraid that I could catch a cold or a virus here so I will go home next week, most probably. But I still don’t know how everything will go on.
We need to get my back well so I can get on the transplant list and get new lungs. Right now it doesn’t look very good but I won’t give up. I just hope that somebody will have an idea how to help me.
Meanwhile I try to make the best of it. Today, one of my best friends will visit me. In the morning I was sending jokes to my stepson and laughed with him 🙂
He and Luis will come to Germany soon. I’m so happy about that 🙂
Today is a better day. During the last weeks I was so much in pain and always feeling very sick. Today it’s a little better. Im so thankful for those hours, when I have less pain.
Now I’m sitting here in my bed, listening to buena vista social club and waiting for my friend 🙂
My cf- doctor told me that he was sorry that he couldn’t put me on the list. Well. It’s nice of him but doesn’t really help me. I’m happy that I found a hospital that will list me as soon as I get rid of the infection.
The doctors say, that they don’t think that the back will heal. But I won’t give up. I just try to stand the pain and wait till it goes away one day. And then I will get my lungs, I will recover and LIVE!!!!